Sunday, July 1, 2012

Pricks, Parks, and Panting

So the other day I was due to move into the apartment.

Shit did not work out..

Aside from the landlord assuring me that the broken microwave and bathroom fan were working when not a sound was being made from them, he tried to con me into signing a 6 month lease in order to keep my 2 month deposit that is required in Taiwan. The old bastard even then had the audacity to tell me to recommend his place to my friends.

Well at least now I won't have to try to cook in a microwave with a broken start button or keep food in a 20 year old fridge that smelled like wilted wet laundry.

At least I can stay in the same hostel for my duration for fairly cheap.

(Cozy)

After coming to terms with getting shafted I headed out to get some comfort food as cathartic compensation.



 The sidewalks sparkle in the street light.






 Subway has a diverse selection of cheeses available as you can see.


 And Kyushu seaweed chips are fucking delicious, while Tunnel rice liquor makes me gag like a gagglge of geese. (I promise to stop with this abundant alliteration abuse)


The next day I joined some friends in their excursion to the Chiang Kai-shek memorial hall. It was a pretty chill place involving awesome architecture and a 4 legged man


                                                                                    4 legs ^

Ok so it was merely a trick of perspective, but it served to amuse me.

The memorial to Chiang Kai-shek was basically a copy of the Lincoln memorial, but the steps were closed off for reconstruction so I couldn't get close enough to get a picture of papa Chiang in his chair unfortunately.



Today was also filled with magical adventure and shit.

We went to a massive park on the outskirts of the city up in the mountains. It cost a grand total of 20 US cents (CF FREEDOM DOLLARY DOOS) for the bus ride.

Also no birds were allowed on the bus.

 I SUPPOSE IT WAS A RAMPANT PROBLEM

The climb thereafter was hell, but the view was incredible.

Our hiking path was known as the healthy trail or some shit and consisted of 400 steps narrow as a hand, covered in moss, and steep as some sort of very steep thing that is difficult to climb (use your imagination)

Now for some pictures.



  

There was also a swag ass praying mantis

Here is a picture of his blurry face


(Look at those arms, somebody's been liftin weights and eatin steaks)

Here was the view that awaited us.
We then celebrated with beer and lunch

I call it beerunch




The restaurant itself was completely self-sufficient at the top of this mountain. It was kinda like a hippie commune but with less pretension and more practicality.



Now for a cool lizard and some chill waterfalls





We also ran across a Buddhist shrine, a karaoke bar that was pouring out water from the roof (It hadn't rained at all which made the whole thing rather confusing), and a rape tunnel.





After this our adventures had concluded with a very tired and pained trip back to our respective abodes.

I celebrated the day with traditional Taiwanese Mcdonalds.

I got some oriental burger.

And by oriental I mean a spicy chicken filet sandwich.


Beep beep, I'm a jeep.

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